Saturday, July 7, 2012

Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel

Went to Alma Restaurant in Red Hook to experience fantastic Mexican food and to enjoy the amazing view of the city on the roof deck. This being one of those major hottie days and before the sun went down. When the hostess warned us it may be an hour wait for the roof, we quickly agreed to eat indoors. The comfort of the cool air-conditioning quickly gave us sweet relief and confidence in our decision. We were celebrating P's brother's birthday.

M is a brother in the church. He is continuing his studies now, going further into the brotherhood and I guess ranks. Not sure how it works but his next step is to continue studying theology in France. Not too shabby. If anyone deserves or you wish them to have, a blessed life, it's M. He is truly a pleasure to be around and as he ages just a tiny bit, I start to feel more of his essence. Almost as you would a beloved character in a story book. He has a joy about him that is contagious and being around him always makes me feel better.

When I was a little girl right around the first years of school I somehow got the outrageous notion that I was some kind of an angel. Not exactly an angel myself but perhaps I had lived amongst them? But let's be clear, not a regular person. Don't ask me how or where the idea formed I just know that from before I can remember I 'knew' that God had sent me down to live with humans to be a kind of 'helper'. I had the sense I had been here before but this time in another type of body, a little girl. I'm not sure what I was to help to do, or who I was to help. I was just convinced that I would know when the time came what I needed to do. With this came responsibility to keep a very low profile, thus my shyness. Staying humble was always at the top of the list. And I believed it so much that I would get a little scared in church that perhaps I'd get 'outted' should someone recognize my powers. The fact that I had no powers did not deter me from owning my gift. On the school bus I'd ride sitting in the sunlight listening to Motown or the Doobie Brothers, maybe Old Black Water would be on for example because thank goodness even though we were in Catholic school, we still had cool hippy bus drivers. But so anyway, suddenly I would feel myself becoming luminous in that seat. That there was a presence speaking to me but not in the normal way. An unearthly exchange of sorts. A Divine touch that gave me such instant assurance. As if someone looking at me could almost see God through me. I laugh now (albeit nervously) almost in disbelief but I'm here telling you that its the truth! And there really wasn't a cut off time where I stopped believing it. I just maybe never mentioned it again. Am I a nutjob? Most likely. I'm not sure what it was all about, although I have some theories. And the story goes on but basically this is but one of the oddities of my childhood. I told P this story and through the years we've sort of made fun at my expense.

But you know I look at M sometimes and I catch a glimpse of God I think. Not that I think he IS or he's channeling him but I see something that I can't quite describe but I know that its origin is very, very good. Familiar to what I felt as that young girl where every part of my body, soul and mind felt fully blessed right at that moment on that bus listening to those songs with the light breeze blowing through my long, probably ratty, dirty hair.

The food at Alma was incredible. Each bite a sensation and we didn't miss that view one bit. My Poblano Relleno was stuffed with just the right amount of slow cooked pork, raisins and green olives with a roasted tomato sauce that was out of this world. The rice! The rice was some crazy but oh so-right concoction baked, with tomato, chilies and cheddar cheese. The Tres Leche cake was faultless and needs to be recognized. The mole enchiladas...I'm speechless. Not to mention P's steak on that fajita platter. Everything was underplayed and yet so over the top good.

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