I'm Skittish!

Sing along!

brooklynfoodmonkey9 · I'm Skittish!

I'm skittish!

This city's givin' me the creeps!

I'm skittish!

The shit is gittin' pretty deep!

You're number came up,

said my husband,

Be more like Eckhart Tolle,

Don't mind what happens,

Dude gunned it at the corner,

eeeerrrk, crash!! (sound)

Hold up, Hold up

So, all day at work, I had the fear

That some evil darkness was lurking near 

So what happened was,

I was hit by a car

on my way home 

You get me so far?

Now I ain't some young girl of 20,

I celebrate  in decades,

Already had DIS MANY! (holds up six fangers)

it's hard to be old and on a bike

In a city that dismisses all us misses 

that's past our prime

Was there a stop sign there? as he jumps out the car.

Hell yeah Muthahf#c&er what you think I R? 

laying on the road, my limbs splayed out like a splat

You think bike tires work all jacked up like that?

I'm trying to figure out if I can get on my feet.

Seeing what's broken or if I've scraped any meat 

or if there's blood 

gushing out from my lady parts,

Just then a witness hobbles over screamin'

I sawer it from the start!  

He HIT YOU! 

He was in the wrong!

Go to the hospital, make him drive you home.

I say, I'd rather die right here on the street,

Then go to Brooklyn ER 

on a Saturday night!

Dude I'm Skittish!

This city givin' me the creeps!

I'm Skittish

Shit gittin' real deep!

Like Old School Will Farrell 

Gittin shot in the neck

I think I see Blue!

as I hit the deck

Yup, dat's him

and he's glorious

Can you stand up?

I say 

 

You're crazy Man!  

But it's gonna hurt like hell in days to come!

The guy asks me, Do you want a ride home,

I say, NO THANKS!

you 'bout killed me SON! 

So he called me an UBER and we stood by.

It's hard when your assailant is a friendly white guy.

But now I sent the bill and he's taken to the sky

Like Bloodstone

 

I love that song, you remember that song P?

Get back to it!

Now thinkin' back he mighta been drunk,

I shoulda cursed and screamed but instead I shrunk,

I don't know if it was entirely your fault

shot out my mouth like a lightning bolt 

like a Touretta Lynn,

I say stupid shit

when I get a little nervous, 

words squirt out like spit.

On the ride home I get to thinkin'

2022 tryin' to take me out!

With COVID and Long Haul and machetes about

in the subways and that's why I ride my bike,

you can't predict when a rando will strike.

I'm skittish!

This city giving me the creeps!

I'm skittish!

This shit is gittin real deep!

I'm just trying to get to heaven before they close the door

Bobby D knows WHAT we're living FOR!

I know old ladies can't rock like Flavuh,

but I'm shinin' up my words like 

BILLY JOE SHAVER!

I ain't giving up,

still wanna live my life

Get out the city, maybe head down south

Lay out on the beach with Mark and Tee

Our main man Nate, dogs Dais' and Scrappy

We got a 401k for when we retire

Can't quick now 'cause who will hire,

an old lady with very little skills,

 and less to admire!

So for now,

I'll go back to work and heal

Tell the story to my homies and stay GRATEFUL

They all listen and say 

girl, you might be cursed

But err'body's sayin' 

It COULDA BEEN MUCH WORSE!

I'm skittish!

Somehow after the accident, in a daze, I managed to make food.  Amy's Mac and Cheese fortified with broccoli, ham, onions and green beans.   

Editor's Note:  I survived but unfortunately today, on that same route to work, the same ride in time, a girl was fatally struck on her bike in Red Hook and didn't make it.  I had coworkers calling me frantic, all thinking it was me.  Ride safe and my heart goes out to the family that got that bad news today.