Well They'll Stone You and Say That It's the End

Had another virtual appointment with doc today.  Unfortunately once you mention you're having a hard time with chest pains, they need to see you in person so we headed out for a real visit.  They have what I call a Leper entrance,  someone comes to get you from outside, they lead you down a stairway into one room in the basement that they call the Clean Room.  There I had more blood tests, the antibody test, and EKG and my vitals were good.  I was able to get P seen as well, and also get bloodwork.  The doctor told me that more and more of his patients like us are coming back, now he's seeing more people 6 - 8 weeks out still dealing with symptoms.  So his advise was that it is just going to last as long as it lasts and that's what it is.

I have a real hard time with doctors.  I love ours in many ways, so this issue is coming from me. My brain fogs up even though I write questions down, I'm too freaked out to ask much of anything when in the examining room.  I just go numb.  In the end, after all the tests it doesn't matter what you say, this is what it is I guess. I tried to listen very carefully to what he's telling me, which isn't much.  It isn't until after he's gone I realize I still have so many unanswered questions, again. 

It was cold and rainy this day, the appointment was postponed until later in the afternoon initially and so it basically took a whole day to get through all of this.  P was completely spent, tired and never asks questions, so he almost worked against me.  He always tells doctors he's just fine.  This is another male thing I believe but when the doctor is male too, it makes me wonder how this affects our statistics overall.  P is getting better but I really wanted him to disclose all his bizarre symptoms and behaviors of the past week. Not being able to feel his legs and hands for whole days at a time and his knees going whopperjawed when he walked!   That he too has a dull ache in his chest that comes while walking and that he doesn't make it past a couple of blocks yet. How about the fact that he sleptwalked one night!  Nothing...crickets.  I hear them laughing about the divorce rate this might cause and I give up.  You begin to feel sorry for yourself, like the world is against you in this circumstance.   Deflated, defeated I just ate leftovers that night.  Tomorrow's a new day and I hope to begin feeling better again soon.  I know we will because if it doesn't get worse, it can only get better. 

New York Tough stickers appear on an old mailbox

My nephew's burgers from his LA pop-up site Truck and Trowel 

I stare at these burgers admiring the burger to bun ratio, the thickness perfection, the amount of cheese and onions, the warm lightly grilled bun.  I can taste them just by knowing all of these elements make the perfect burger.