Saturday, January 16, 2016

So If You Meet Me, Have Some Sympathy and Some Taste

If God and the Devil both invited you over for lunch on the same day, which would you choose?
You know the devil is going to have an amazing decadent spread.  Glutenous portion sizes.  In my mind he would go heavy handed on the meats, perhaps barbecue delicacies at their most tender.  Oysters on the half shell and various beasts of the sea on never ending platters.  Spicy, bold flavors with heat.  Sides fit for a king.  I see truffles and rich sauces.  Wicked good desserts, your fantasy pleasure.  Not just one but whole trays of layered stacked whipped cream topped wonders.
 The devil wants you to follow him. He needs your soul to fuel his furnace.  Along with a slammin' lunch he feeds you all kinds of ideas and evil suggestions that will make you feel even better, just like cocaine.
People say God gives you everything you need.  You just need to ask for it and accept His grace.  He asks you to abide by one golden rule but promises eternal life.  
But God, right?  C'mon, His food has to be superior.  However, it would be gentle on the gut.  Everything would be seasoned to perfection.  I imagine a heavenly pie or cake warmed with ice cream melted over top.  One simple but perfect offering.  God would serve strong but elegant coffee drinks.  The main dish, a modest portion of the most delicious fare imaginable.  Something with cheese but the good kind, the kind you never afford for yourself.  The kind you always wanted to splurge on but couldn't bring yourself to do. The kind you eat modest amounts of and still feel completely satiated.  Fruit, herbs and the freshest vegetables from His own garden of course, his bounty represented.  There is nothing so fine as natural food at the peak of freshness and ripeness. I'm thinking He's a vegan but for your special invitation he's making an exception and promises no animals were harmed in the making of your luncheon.
The correct answer?  It's a trick question.  NEVER enter Satan's house EVEN if he promises you lunch, sheeez!  He's evil, remember?  He's not a good person!  What's wrong with you??!!
One-bowl meal - salad inspired by the seven layer Mexican dips you always see in appetizer menus.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Just nod if you can hear me. Is there anyone at home?