I prepared for P's birthday dinner the next night, prebaking the carrot cream cheese cake bars. Love those one bowl recipes for non-bakers.
I pre-stuffed the jalapeno's to just throw in the broiler the next night. I had some leftover filling so I ended up shoving it in my chicken thighs. Sharp cheddar, chorizo, onion and garlic. Feeling all clever and resourceful. Well fed and grateful. This is the disposition that I shoot for in my day to day. I fail, almost every day but I will always choose this feeling above depression.
My hope is that people will remember me as someone who chose joy and laughter above what I fight against which is grief and sorrow.
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Just nod if you can hear me. Is there anyone at home?