Thursday, January 8, 2015

Flee From Me Keepers of the Gloom

You rarely see the sunsets in New York unless of course you have a fantastic view like the one we temporarily have at work.  A huge picture window to see the Hudson River's upper bay.  We had the most amazing sunsets lately and it's such a pity that most people can't see them.  
Even though it's barely nature, but ships and tug boats, parking lots, ferries instead of open water. Still it's impossible not to dream on it when it's right there in front of you.  You don't get wide open spaces in New York like this, so it also makes it that much more special.
Sometimes it's crystal clear, sometimes its all murky and glum, like me.  You learn to stop and appreciate these different views when you put in some time here on earth.  It becomes even more magical, the colors, the glow, the power of the sun. The way it can make you feel all silent and humble.  Everyone always talks about what you lose when you get older but I'm noticing the opposite.  I think we gain keener ability to use all of our senses and we can take it deeper, go to 11 so to speak.  There is added ability to stay calm enough to enjoy it too and sometimes just be.  I for one have never been comfortable enough with myself to just be, in my youth, unless I was more than slightly inebriated.  So yeah, this is good stuff.  It's not to say complacency.  I'm still highly dissatisfied and on any given day you could probably find me complaining of my misery.  Afterall I am a work in progress. Well actually I could work on the progress part a lot more than I do.  It's a problem actually.  But what I'm focusing on here is that sunset and that sky and the fact that there is a whole world outside of me and my despondency.  Sometimes just knowing that can eliminate my gloom.  The little trick is that when I do stop and acknowledge these things, it puts all the other stupid stuff into more a manageable light, so at the very least it dilutes it.  This is what happens to people who don't have kids.

Tonight i made this simple baked chicken breast with a cajun rub and sauced up masa with peas.  So good that it's hard to believe how straightforward it is.  The focus was just on getting the chicken cooked to perfection.  



I topped this with a cool guacamole with pears and walnuts.

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