The mystery of the quotient; Upon Us All a Little Rain Must Fall

When I was a young girl full of spit and vinegar and my whole world evolved around rock music, guitars, fun drugs, cute boys and best friends, I still had a big love of good food. I was born a foodie. Lots of nights were spent getting dolled up and romping around my home town. The music blaring out of my power booster, a friend holding one to blow in the park. Life was just starting, everything ahead of me and no rush to get there.
On mellower nights I used to love to pick up my sister and head out to a great restaurant. Lots of times it was my mom and dad's because really they had the best food. But one of our other favorite spots was Zoli's Italian Restaurant. They had candles, white table cloths and male waiters. We'd sit and drink Little Kings and chat for hours. Mostly, they had the BEST food. You could also take out and we took out their 'grinders' regularly. I've never had an Italian Grinder anywhere since.

Until today. This morning actually, which is kinda sinful but our logic was that if your going to eat a 1000 calories, best to do it early.

My sister was a foodie too. She understood a good dish. We could talk about what they did right, how they made it, what made it special. She was my best friend as far as I was concerned. We were two years apart but I related to her more than any of my other friends.


Grinders are unlike hoagies or submarines in that they are always toasted, they include a marinara sauce and melted mozzarella cheese and the meats used are a step up from regular deli meats, like salami and pepperoni. To me they were a cross between a hot sub and a calzone. The bread was crunchy with a bit of softness inside. God they were good. Grinders are a more serious dinner-type sandwich. They are the real deal.

I've craved them for years. This week I've thought a lot about my sister and that time, the 70's music, not caring about anything.

I guess making this sandwich became pretty important to me. I wanted to recreate it. I can't recreate that time of my life, I have to make new memories. I can't have it all back but truly only the best recalls were keepers and most of those are pretty fuzzy. The rest of the time was a lot of nothingness. Truth is that I was squandering my youth away. I had no clear direction and the weed in a midwestern town was not that good all the time and the drugs were questionable at best.


I split the bread and painted on a coat of homemade pizza sauce on both sides. I added slices of mozzarella, then roasted banana peppers, turkey ham, pepperoni, tomatoes, onions and pepperoncini peppers. Salt and pepper and a bit of olive oil with just a smattering of lettuce to wilt on top. Into a 400 degree oven until everything is toasty and melty. I pressed the two sides together and hoped for the best. I gave this sandwich every fighting chance for success. I wished for it to turn out good and it did.

Me and my sister are growing closer again and that is so important to me. We've both been through so much and lately things are looking up. This grinder is a tribute to the grind of life and giving it your best shot and honoring those two young girls with all their dreams ahead of them.