I hate to give any prudence to my America is over fear, but I can't shake this internal feeling that portions of freedom have ended in our country, for some of us. That whole dream of retiring on a lake house with just enough funds to live a small life, eat well and be comfortable before they make glue out of us, seems further and further from my grasp. I hope to get there. I try not to consider the future much but the look of the present, leaves me with stark visions. It doesn't help that I have the most vivid apocalyptic dreams.
I heard the 80's were off the chain in New York, but we're seeing the most brutal, horrific crimes happening in broad daylight on the daily. The pace of chaos at every turn is intensifying as the country faces new issues, those of which I will not list because it's depressing and long ass.
Bitch, what does this have to do with festive summer food, you say?! I don't know, looking at the plate, it feels nostalgic, from a time different then the one we're living in. This meal also brings to mind where we are right now in history and all these images of the 4th of July and America are slightly skewed. Last year the holiday was gangs of kids vandalizing the streets of Brooklyn, throwing fireworks from cars, lighting trash cans ablaze. It was banning of celebrations due to fire hazards because of the droughts in the west. It was the virus keeping us from gathering, all over.
And again, some lethal combination of politics, media and the inability to socialize, caused a measurable shift in people, that's hard to define. Some seem ready to throw down on the streets, operating on very short fuses. I witnessed a quick exchange passing two men on the sidewalk, while on my bike yesterday where one pushed the other and berated him verbally because the older man bumped into the younger guy, by accident. The old man remained passive and got out of there but it elevated so quickly and neither was drunk or crazy. The elderly man could have fallen from the shove and been hurt and I pray I would have the guts to stop and help him if he did.
I'm also seeing more subtle examples, like I inadvertently wore a red white and blue colored outfit, of soccer pants and trucker hat in my neighborhood and it took a minute to realize why everyone looked like they wanted to spit on me. God forbid I become the poster child for patriotism but I find it ugly troubling that this unintentional fashion faux pas prompted such looks of disgust and judgement just for wearing colors that represent our country. We shouldn't allow ourselves to believe those colors represent negatives, like racism, close mindedness or bigotry. At the very least they should not spark such repulsion from our educated youth. You would have thought I was wearing a Creed T-shirt.
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