Friday, March 13, 2015

Very Superstitious, The Devil's On His Way


Friday the 13th. I'm not superstitious but something or someone had me spooked all day, starting with this creepy ass school crossing guard that appeared out of nowhere during the ugliest stretch of my commute to work. Just standing there in a veil of overpass rain.   I should have turned around right then and there because it wasn't raining.  That yellow ghost was a sign that the demons would track me down on this day and shatter my composition.  I had a headache anyway but my very first customer T-boned me like in the movies now where you're all calm anticipating the next scene and a car comes hauling like a bat out of hell from the side and next thing you know you're checking your heart rate because it scared the living crap out of you.  Had me one of those nights when you replay the conversation over and over in your head searching for the perfect words to send this asshole reeling.  I consider it a weakness to allow unappetizing bullies to penetrate my psyche. I try to use the experiences as a tool, but mostly I just end up internalizing it all and brooding.  Sometimes you're weak and sometimes people are just really that horrid.  
I'm gonna call this one a prick. That's my highest rank.  It's the C word for men.  Assholes are easy. Assholes are not that smart and in a way you can take them at face value.  They don't claim to be anything more.  I can deal with assholes.  They're like baby cockroaches.  I wish they weren't there but as long as they don't get all big, we can share the world.  Pricks are educated assholes with money.  Their sins are doubled because they not only know better, they use all their talents for evil and power.   This prick pressed some button that just sucked all the air out of my head.  He was privileged, arrogant, condescending, typical Manhattan- 'I get what I want and I'm not afraid to throw a temper tantrum to get it'- ite.  A ginormous reaction storm was brewing in me so strong from this little interaction.   Hell, I might just blow my entire lid like a pressure cooker right here and now.  This was after I tried to ration, talk sense. A big mistake with pricks.  But all the while reminding him that he was no one special in the least and whatever bullshit he would sell to my wide-eyed manager child, I had his number at his smirk ass grin while giving a small woman his brute forced intimidating handshake.  My feathers were ruffled, my chonies were bunched all the way up me arse.  He got his way, because that's how this world will do ya sometimes.  I couldn't pull it all back together, not even to crack a fake smile as I left the floor, not even well after he'd left.  From that moment all I could do was look out of my eyes like I was peering out of small cut holes in a cardboard box until I could turn that final lock on my front door.
Some days you wake up and set on just doing your thing, not bothering anyone, maybe have a laugh and for whatever reason, some prick comes along and pulls the plug, trips you and then kicks you again while you lay there on the ground holding your gut.  And you gotta wonder, geez what the hell did I do??

I ran in the door to make something edible before I slithered into my bed and pulled the blankets over my head. Sauteed kale with garlic and lemon with a cajun rubbed baked chicken breast.  Now that I got my heat and timing down on those suckers, I'm digging white meat chicken much more.  Edamame with sesame oil and salt.

He's gonna make me say it, and I really don't want to....damn it. Here it comes...Haters gonna hate.

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