I don't remember celebrating my birthday as a child. I don't have memories of cake or any particular year, anyone singing. I have a picture on a tricycle that I'm told was my 5th birthday but I don't recall it. The only one I remember was my 21st. My friend and I were to move to California in a couple of months and we were gonna make a party out of every night we could. We were in a perpetual state of bliss. I broke up with my boyfriend ahead of time trying to be efficient but still had the girl-balls to ask him to hold our going away party at his house. He was fun but I felt like I rode his last wave before he was about to give out. I didn't harbor ill feelings though. Even then I always saw life as a continuous. Nothing started or ended. If you were friends with anyone, you'd always be friends. If there was once love there would always be love. If you lived somewhere, you never really left.
I'm not celebrating a special birthday today, but I am celebrating. 53. I picked Beef Green Curry from National Thai my favorite and some noteworthy chocolate cakes from L.A. Burdick. A nice shrimp fresh spring roll and fried tofu with a peanut butter dipping sauce. Every year is a reason to believe time does not exist as we know it.

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Just nod if you can hear me. Is there anyone at home?