Baby, Baby Don't Get Hooked On Me

Just scrambled eggs with fresh 'penos and sweet onions but still good.  My point today was I believe little by little we snuck bread back into our daily food.  We had stopped eating it for a while and boy did the weight just go right down to a more comfortable body fit.  It's as if your stomach goes into some better balance without the bread.  I felt better and lighter and not bloated.

Mainly, I wanted to see if the wheat had anything to do with my migraines and I'm still not sure but I didn't have attacks during the time we weren't eating it.  But we also do this from time to time just to sort of feel better. We know it works but it's always surprising just how much peppier we feel too. 

The hard thing about not eating bread is that you tend to eat more meat.  I try to put a couple servings of vegetables on the plate and make it about variety but it takes getting used to. You almost have to trick yourself.  I find it's easier to mix the meat into the vegetables to control the quantity. Another tip is to add pickley things or fruit to the dinner plate. Again, the variety helps in between bites of the entrée.

But it's mysterious why if your body feels so much better not eating it, why we wouldn't just fight the cravings?  The cravings are real strong at certain times.  And it's so easy to slip back and get hooked. It seems to start with breakfast toast with me and then builds into a gigantic bowl of pasta before I know it. 
You'll note I'm eating Whole Wheat Tortillas for this breakfast.  Those may be a bit better but in my experience, the gateway to flour tortillas.

Do Me A Favor, Open the Door...Let Em In

We are so fortunate to be able to walk a block and get the best burgers.  We split one on this day from 67 Burger. Two halves of two amazing burgers.  Both fabulous.  Why can't we see how lucky we are from day to day, more consistently?  I hate to admit it but deep inside, I see the glass as half full...half full of assholes!  Some days I can't help but concentrate on all that's missing and wrong, corrupt, ill-planned.  Why? Why can't I just choose to be happy or more content?  Why recognize negativity? 

It's as if everything I know is in the empty part of that glass.  The familiars. depression, sadness, the longing, the discontent.  The broken-hearted, the lonely, the skittish, the leery, the hurt, the distrusting.  The sacked.  The weary, tired and weak. I can hang with the crowd that see the glass half full.  And I can see it too. It's much happier over there. I believe it exists, let's put it that way.  My world is filled with amazing beautiful interesting people and Brooklyn is the most fascinating place one could live in so many ways.  Why can't I just let it all be my reality?  Why would anyone choose to fill their thoughts with the asswipes?  Take my job for example. Please. Bahdumbump.  I really like my gay guy from Texas who always has tons of interesting things to report and talks a mile a minute, can't seem to finish a thought.  We have lunch when we get the chance to take our breaks together.  I really enjoy the Rasta drummer who loves to talk about the 'what if's' in a way that a child see things.  He seems to see things with fresh eyes and it's fun to listen to him. His sentences always start out with 'imagine if'. I love that! Regularly when I ride my bike, I see good people just living their lives.  That's a nice satisfying thing.  But it's like I see it thru the glaring muck.  It's there but it's an exception.

I had all these super tasty leftovers from the 4th get-together so I was able to construct these kick-ass quesadillas with steak and corn and peno's, cheese and salsa.

I served with black beans to make myself think I was eating something semi-healthy.

What seems to fill my head are the sneers of the mean girls I pass in the bathroom at work or on the streets.  But a lot of people smile and say hi.  I store the memories of the ones who throw those bad ugly vibes.  The one bad experience from the bike ride, what will keep rolling in my mind will be the asshole that cut me off on Fulton. Or the jerk who had to pass me but now I'm having to ride slower because I'm on his tail but won't let me pass. What a turd!  Are these all coincidences or simply confirmations that everything I fear is true about people and life? 

But none of that is as interesting to me as why one would even bother to accept any of that if they could instead consider all the good and hold that as their proof. Why can't I just be grateful and cool?  Live in the moment and see the glory that fills these days.  Enjoy my burgers and steak quesadillas and just be cool.

Living in the Promiseland

A girl at work wanted to trade me last minute for the 4th of July so I took the deal.  I lost time and a half but I gained a small get together with friends.  Everything was last minute so it made menu planning realistic. What could I really do on short notice?  I was going to do the traditional burgers, potato salad, baked beans type of meal but P fears the beer buzz gets squashed when the boys are allowed to sit and make a whole plate so he asked me to keep it to finger foods.  I like those best actually so I agreed.

Nothing was hugely impressive.  The heat was stifling that day so I had to try to prepare everything before they arrived to cool the apartment down in time.  I made green apple salsa and peach salsa with chips which sort of limped out in the heat. Tweren't as refreshing as they could have been.  I did fried pickles and pickled jalapenos in a ranch dipping sauce. Those are best straight out of the fryer but they were sitting out for a bit. Meh.  I had steak bites and bloody mary dipping sauce (pictured from a past event). Those were good especially because it was super cheap steak but I took the time to marinate overnight.  And tiny cheeseburger sliders. Surprised not to find slider buns so I just cut hot dog buns in half! Cool tip! The backstory was a back kitchen queso fundido fail.  Another example of my short attention span with following recipes.  I forgot to add the flour before mixing in the cheese to the roux type of sauce and so the cheese just became one big blob that kept hardening more and more.  I had it flavored so nicely with beer, garlic, pepperoni bits and three kinds of cheeses. I refused to give up on it but finally realized nothing could revive the rock hard mass. It was to be the wow dish too.  But you live and learn and sometimes you screw it up.

So after that, the wow factor instead became the 4th of July Strawberry Shortcake. I baked the shortcake the night before and it was light and fluffy, really good with the fresh whipped cream and berries.

And this was a first for me, making something red white and blue on the 4th.  We were able to talk about how we're failing as a country and what's going wrong, what are we doing right.  Where there is hope and what life has been for each of us.  For me and my personal recession, it was a little bit of a triumph that I could say no to time and a half for the day and enjoy a day off.  They say the prayer of everyman is to know how freedom feels.